


An Interesting Thing Happened on the Way Out of Tromso...

by celeste9



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Primeval, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Crossover, Dinosaurs, Gen, Humor, Snark, Tasers, Team Dynamics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-02
Updated: 2014-02-02
Packaged: 2018-01-10 23:15:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1165749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celeste9/pseuds/celeste9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The arrival of the ARC team was probably the first interesting thing that had ever happened in Tromso.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Interesting Thing Happened on the Way Out of Tromso...

**Author's Note:**

> For rain_sleet_snow in Fandom Stocking.

Darcy wondered whether it was possible to talk so much that you forgot to breathe and actually died from it. If it was, Jane was probably about twenty seconds from doing so. She definitely had to be using up all her oxygen prattling on.

The British guy, Connor, was basically Jane’s platonic soul mate. They hadn’t stopped talking about science since he’d gotten there, him and his dinosaur-fighting team, or whatever they were. The ARC. Darcy approved of the soldiers. Lots of black, lots of straps in strategic places.

They reminded her of Clint. Clint had been the best thing about New Mexico. (At least, the best thing aside from Thor’s abs.) Darcy was thinking the scandalously pretty one, Becker (Darcy had nicknamed him Captain Pretty on first sight - everyone but Becker found that hilarious), he made a pretty good Clint stand-in. His ass was certainly comparable. Though he was perfectly stoic when she tried flirting, which was disappointing. Clint had a smart mouth. Maybe Becker was shy.

She’d wear him down.

“God, they just go on, don’t they?” Darcy said.

Abby smiled in a knowing sort of way. “Connor isn’t used to having an audience that actually wants to listen to what he says, or one that understands what he’s talking about.”

Darcy liked Abby. She was tiny and lithe in that way that meant she was probably a badass, like the Black Widow. Darcy wasn’t entirely certain she wanted to meet the Black Widow - even the flashes of her during the Battle of New York had been terrifying.

Abby wasn’t terrifying, though. Not yet, anyway. She made for good company and laughed at Darcy’s snarky comments, which was always a plus. Apparently she was dating the cute soldier who swore like a sailor (Darcy found his language paired with his incredibly posh accent both fascinating and hilarious), so, kudos. “Jane’s been without Doctor Selvig since S.H.I.E.L.D. snapped him up,” Darcy said. “There’s only so much interest I can feign where physics is involved.” She paused. “Wait. I think S.H.I.E.L.D.’s supposed to be a secret. Forget I mentioned it.”

Rolling her eyes, Abby said, “Your top-secret organization is safe as far as my top-secret organization is concerned.”

“Oh. Right.”

It had to be said, this was the first interesting thing that had happened since S.H.I.E.L.D. had shipped them over to Tromso. _Tromso._ As far as Darcy could tell, there was absolutely nothing worth anything in Tromso. Also it was cold. Supposedly it was summer but it was hard to tell, particularly after New Mexico.

That wasn’t even getting into the fact that New York had happened and they were in fucking Tromso. Jane had been pissed, knowing they’d sent her off like she was a fairy tale damsel in distress instead of letting her help like she could have, and then she’d cried because Thor was gone and she hadn’t even seen him, aside from the constant footage on the television. There had been a lot of ice cream and Disney movies.

Anyway. Tromso. They were supposed to have been on a flight back to the U.S. two hours ago, but, well. Something interesting finally happened and instead Jane was Doing Science with the British people while Darcy ogled the soldiers.

The thing was an anomaly, apparently. The only way to think about it without breaking her brain was as a sci-fi type rip in time and space. Of course, Darcy was kind of used to brain-breaking things ever since they’d run over an alien.

This was how it had gone down. Jane had been following some weird energy readings with one of her handmade do-hickeys (Darcy was pretty sure that particular contraption was the reason the toaster didn’t work anymore) when they got stopped by a couple of soldiers blocking the way. Jane was only just getting started in a rant about suppression of rights (she’d had a lot of practice with S.H.I.E.L.D. but the soldiers were unimpressed, particularly the stone-faced one with all the knives) when Captain Pretty came running through, chasing after what was definitely a dinosaur. It looked just like a picture Darcy could still remember from the dinosaur encyclopedia she’d had she was a kid. Except alive.

Captain Pretty shot it, and it went down, except it wasn’t an actual gun. More like a giant taser.

“Okay,” Darcy said. “Who do I have to blow to get one of those?”

“Don’t pay any attention to her, she’s not serious,” Jane said to anyone who would listen, continuing to talk over Darcy’s protests of, “Oh, I’m totally serious.”

Jane just kept going on about magnetic readings or something, so Darcy decided to be helpful. She scooted away from the soldiers and over to the unconscious dinosaur, which pissed off Captain Pretty, who Darcy now knew was Becker (though she still preferred the nickname) and also was a suitable distraction. Jane ran down the street and about ten seconds later, Darcy heard her say, “Holy crap.”

Becker swore and Darcy smiled sweetly at him. “You want to shoot me with that awesome taser so bad right now, don’t you?”

He hadn’t shot her, though Darcy was inclined to believe that if not for the interference of the gorgeous woman in the high heels and with the red lips, he might have.

Her name was Jenny and she was a smooth talker, but she hadn’t counted on Darcy and Jane already having dealt with rainbow bridges and aliens pretending to be gods.

“I have a PhD in astrophysics,” Jane said, like it was important or something.

Okay, maybe it was a little important. It certainly got Connor talking. Though Darcy wasn’t going to stop trying to convince her that she should lead with the God of Thunder totally wanting to bang her.

And there it was. The first interesting thing to happen in Tromso, possibly ever.

-

Darcy, after having succeeded in causing a facial twitch in Captain Becker (it was the little things in life), came upon Abby Skyping with someone from the ARC.

“Yeah, it’s weird,” Abby was saying. “It’s like the one in the Forest of Dean except it never opens in exactly the same place. But between Connor and Doctor Foster, we should have it squared away soon.”

She was speaking to a black woman in glasses, her dark hair pulled back. “I hope so. We could use you back here. Lester’s stressed and that never bodes well for anyone.”

Abby smirked. “Aw, don’t tell me he misses us.”

“He misses your job skills, certainly, and that’s all he’d ever admit to.”

Abby registered Darcy’s presence. “Oh, hey, Darcy. Lorraine, this is Darcy, Doctor Foster’s lab assistant.”

Darcy waved at the laptop screen. “Basically I’m her slave but it’s all right. She’s a kind mistress as long as I remember to give her coffee and feed her at regular intervals.”

Lorraine laughed. “I know the feeling.”

“Ah, yes, the mysterious Lester. Reports on him are conflicting.”

Abby and Lorraine shared an amused look across the screen. “He’s conflicting, all right,” Abby said.

“Ms. Wickes,” said another voice from the other end of the computer, exactly like the pompous tones Darcy associated with the BBC. “I’m sure I don’t have to remind you that you’re meant to be receiving an update, not gossiping.”

“I’m sure you don’t,” Lorraine said, glancing behind her, a steely expression in her eyes. Darcy liked her already.

The speaker came into a view, a guy in his forties, wearing a really nice suit. His tie matched his pocket square. Darcy was impressed. Not every man could rock a yellow pocket square.

“Ms. Maitland,” he said. “I trust you are doing all in your power to return quickly? Not only are we on a tight budget, but…” He grimaced faintly. “The remaining staff here at the ARC leave something to be desired.”

“Oi!” Yet another voice rang out. “Keep talking like that and I’ll start to think you don’t love me.”

Darcy was pretty sure that was what they referred to as “Cockney”. The juxtaposition of that voice with Lester’s - guy in the spiffy suit could only be Lester - was kind of hilarious.

Lester closed his eyes as though he were praying for patience. Or for lightning to strike the Cockney guy, whatever came first. “Mr. Quinn, if you have nothing to do, I’m sure I can think of something. The mammoth’s enclosure can always do with a good mucking out.”

“I thought I was exempt from that little bit of punishment after I tracked my dirty boots all over your office.”

Before anything drastic could take place - Darcy didn’t like the look of that vein throbbing in Lester’s forehead - Lorraine suggested, “Danny, Captain Ryan asked me to tell you to visit his office when you had the chance.”

Darcy definitely liked Lorraine.

-

It took a week to sort everything out. A week of anomalies opening to the Cretaceous, a week of watching Becker shout orders and run around with big guns and never get a hair out of place.

(Abby was, as suspected, a badass, by the way. More surprising had been the time Darcy watched Jenny, heels and all, calmly shoot a _Troodon_ in the face before it could pounce on Scottish Doctor Cutter. Jenny was not to be messed with. Darcy kind of wanted to kiss her.)

Darcy’s favorite moment was when she’d finally gotten her hands on one of the giant tasers. Apparently when there’s a herd of those dome-headed dinosaurs running about, no one’s inclined to get too fussy about rules and regulations.

They’d had to pry it from her hands afterwards. Darcy was still grieving. Maybe once Coulson let them all in with S.H.I.E.L.D. for real, she could convince Tony Stark to build her one.

The ARC people were all getting set to fly back to England, not a moment too soon, apparently. Lorraine had been running interference all week and would be beyond grateful to have sensible people like Jenny back to help.

That meant that Jane and Darcy were looking at booking a new flight back to the U.S. Darcy was less excited about it than she would have been last week - no more Tromso, which was a definite plus, but she had to admit the world would seem a lot more boring without the Brits around.

And then Jenny said, “What are your thoughts on London?”

**_End_ **


End file.
